(insert creative name here)
kingjaffejoffer:

I would like my ashes scattered at sea immediately please

kingjaffejoffer:

I would like my ashes scattered at sea immediately please

rennymoon6:

tidal—wavve:

SHOTS FIRED

mexicanest:

reading the first question on a test
image

hansofyoursouthernisles:

irelancl:

micdotcom:

The favorite food of every U.S. state, according to Twitter 

Grits are the worst fucking food what are you all on

Blackberries wtf

hansofyoursouthernisles:

irelancl:

micdotcom:

The favorite food of every U.S. state, according to Twitter 

Grits are the worst fucking food what are you all on

Blackberries wtf

sassykardashian:

sailingonsuccess:

sassykardashian:

Science side of tumblr how do I become a jellyfish

Jellyfish have no brains. You’re already pretty close.

Okay WOW

heychessikuh:

She’s actually crying because the word “moist” makes her so uncomfortable. 

How did Tumblr miss this joke?

image

image

…………………….OH MY GOD

i'm not into fat chicks but if i wasn't already seeing someone id still totally bang you
Anonymous

rendezvousramen:

rabbitlounge:

Even if I’m really thirsty, I’d rather not drink from the toilet.

image

all-hail-bill-nye:

totally-stab-caesar:

jennytrout:

jennytrout:

magdalenarivera:


#it is also the ‘i have a live laugh love decoration somewhere in my house’#’i have a child named caedyn’


#Wall decals about bible verses will class up any kitchen #You should come to my Thirty-One party

I can’t stop. There are too many:
#I’m the best mom on this field trip and everyone knows it #Have you read Eat, Pray, Love? #Let’s get lattes after Zumba! #Gluten causes Autism #I will have him pulled out of your class #Oh shoot, I forgot I volunteered to bring brownies to faith group tonight #We don’t let him watch more than one hour of TV a day #Stick figure family window sticker #(whispers behind hand) you’ve got to read 50 Shades of Grey
Forgive me. I am a mother, and I walk among these women every day. I have adopted their ways as a form of camouflage.

dying

ITS BACK AND IT GOT BETTER

all-hail-bill-nye:

totally-stab-caesar:

jennytrout:

jennytrout:

magdalenarivera:

#Wall decals about bible verses will class up any kitchen #You should come to my Thirty-One party

I can’t stop. There are too many:

#I’m the best mom on this field trip and everyone knows it #Have you read Eat, Pray, Love? #Let’s get lattes after Zumba! #Gluten causes Autism #I will have him pulled out of your class #Oh shoot, I forgot I volunteered to bring brownies to faith group tonight #We don’t let him watch more than one hour of TV a day #Stick figure family window sticker #(whispers behind hand) you’ve got to read 50 Shades of Grey

Forgive me. I am a mother, and I walk among these women every day. I have adopted their ways as a form of camouflage.

dying

ITS BACK AND IT GOT BETTER

actualfairyboy:

tardis-mind-palace:

w-for-wumbo:

mylourrydiary:

hlil:

Can u believe there are plants that are illegal
Plants

Can you believe there is love that is illegal
Love

can you believe it’s not butter
butter

the fact that Tumblr can fit weed, bestiality and diary products all into one post doesn’t even phase me anymore

i really dont think they meant bestiality